Horoscopes
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Today
Trot along your path, letting any instances of surprising fortune, shocking stupidity, or amazing flakiness glance off your armor. Whether or not you are consciously aware of it, things are shifting, reconfiguring, and adjusting. Plus, by this time next week you could well be looking at a different picture than the one you're viewing now, at which point you can decide how you'd like to proceed.
Your Birthday
Before chucking arrangements because they're timeworn (translation: you're bored), switching loyalties because the other guy made you big promises and was more flattering, changing agents because the grass is greener (not to mention that they're offering more money!) or the like: Give some thought to how you might feel about the new order once the honeymoon is over. Then consider the appropriate next steps.
ARIES
Monday, March 18, 2024
If you haven't been able to convey your version of events or your point - even though you've employed persuasion, painstaking explanation, and possibly a bullhorn - this probably isn't the moment to try again. Why? Your listener has gotten a second wind, and is primed to defend a ludicrous position until the sun runs out of fuel.
TAURUS
Monday, March 18, 2024
Although you may have an ideal outcome in mind (that only requires a leopard to start zealously scouring off its spots, but we'll let that pass): Try to be incredibly realistic about the circumstances, who everybody is, and what they can offer. Yup, even though current influences also tempt you to don your most adorbs pair of rose-colored glasses.
GEMINI
Monday, March 18, 2024
Refrain from attempting to plan for things that haven't yet happened - both positive and negative. At this moment the likelihood of events emerging according to the script in your hand (or your head) is somewhere on par with a flock of Canadian geese getting seats on your local city council.
CANCER
Monday, March 18, 2024
You might want to tread with care. These planets appear to be more interested in vigorously stirring the coals than they are in pouring water on the campfire, and anything that can possibly be perceived as a slight probably will be. Moreover, the topic most apt to cause the liveliest debate has been bubbling for a while now.
LEO
Monday, March 18, 2024
By now you're probably dying to broadcast your views on a specific situation. Still, take extenuating circumstances into account. You'll have significantly more success by picking your moment than by charging in to pronounce what you don't like and don't want, how somebody should fix it, and who should wear a dunce cap for their colossal faux pas.
VIRGO
Monday, March 18, 2024
There may be a few murmurs and hints inviting you to recognize certain arrangements are past their sell-by dates. Should this occur, your best bet is to devise methods to phase them out, rather than deciding that maybe you're hearing things, and these intimations couldn't possibly have anything whatsoever to do with you.
LIBRA
Monday, March 18, 2024
Try to look at a situation from your counterpart's view before chiming in with your opinions. They're likely doing the best they can, so at least make an attempt to figure out what they're trying to achieve here - even if they appear to be screwing it up in a spectacular fashion - before folding their proposal into a paper plane and launching it out the window.
SCORPIO
Monday, March 18, 2024
Survey the general area and take note the elements that you're partial to and the elements that you wouldn't miss too much if they lost your phone number. The coming weeks are all about opportunities to welcome the changes that are most critical to your growth - whether in the personal, emotional, commercial, financial, or creative realm.
SAGITTARIUS
Monday, March 18, 2024
"How the H-E-double-toothpicks did that happen?!" may be the theme of the day. So stay mentally flexible and limber, because this agility will make all the difference in navigating any sudden shifts in the plan, unanticipated changes coming from out of left field, or abrupt ups and downs on the path.
CAPRICORN
Monday, March 18, 2024
When attempting to get various programs up and running, keep in mind: Sometimes it pays to take the initiative to goose the trajectory of a project (or use a catapult to send it hurtling forward at speed), and sometimes it pays to chill out and let things develop at their own pace. Success is contingent upon knowing which to opt for, and when.
AQUARIUS
Monday, March 18, 2024
You might know what you want, but maybe you shouldn't assume that those around you have their X-Ray goggles trained at your skull and are reading your thoughts as we speak. Seriously, the clearer that you are about conveying your plan, wish, desire, or need, the more likely you are to receive the support you'd dearly love.
PISCES
Monday, March 18, 2024
While you might wish to blow up somebody's phone with texts, emails, and calls until they concede that yes, yes, you are Righty McRight from Righttown, be aware: The chance of them agreeing with you is about even with the odds of encountering a bag of gold dubloons in your Frosted Flakes.